Friday, September 4

Don't know why...

I'm not comfortable with the condition of my belly right now.
Since last night, i don't what's wrong.
If salah makan pun maybe not coz dorang yang lain ok saja their tummy.
Then this afternoon i started to feel abit pain behind my back like menstrual pain.
But not that bad.
Pain in my belly that i felt is like you wanna go and poo or cirit birit but teda juga apa2 la.
My aunt told me that my baby wanna come out already and she asked me to count the jarak masa time2 sa rasa the pain but i dunno how.

Is that the sign that in a few days i will deliver already?

Baby already 36 weeks + 2days now.
My stuff to bring to the hospital not yet done, only halfway.
But baby's stuff already packed.

Sudah la i always feel uncomfortable kan, ney is giving me a hard time again!
tekanan tekanan.

Hopefully everything is going to be okay.

Tuesday, August 18


full body.....
baby pls come out fastttt heheheee

Friday, August 14

picture 8month plus

33 weeks

No head picture hahaa....small belly kan.
baby probably small size.
easy to give birth ;p hahaaa


She’s got a baby inside
And holds her belly tight
All through the night
Just so she knows
She’s sleeping so
Safely to keep
Her growing
And oh when she'll open her eyes
There'll be no surprise
That she'll grow to be
So beautifully
Just like her mother
That’s carrying
Oh Capri
She’s beauty
Baby inside she’s loving
Oh Capri
She’s beauty
There is and angel growin’ peacefully
Oh Capri
Sweet baby
And things will be hard at times
But I've learned to try
Just listening
Patiently, oh Capri
Sweet baby
Oh Capri
She’s beauty
Baby inside she’s loving
Oh Capri
Your beauty
Just like your mother
That’s carrying...Oh Capri...

Monday, August 10

I cannot tahan already!

Its like i've been pregnant FOREVER!!
I can't wait anymore.
I am too tired already of waiting this and that especially this pregnancy.
51 days to go.... this is crazy!
I don't want to be far away from ney espacially during this difficult times but there's nothing i can do.
All i want right now is time goes by fast!!!

One more thing that i'm concern is about the H1N1 here in kgau.
I think it is worst than kk.
Just thinking of going to clinic for review also i am scared and worry then i have to think about deliver time at the hospital where the viruses all over that place...
huh so so so worried!!!

Wednesday, July 29

Here i am

I am back from Tawau already and from short holiday at Kgau.

Now i'm in kk for a week only just to do some shopping for baby's stuff then this saturday i'll be going back to kgau again.
Because i planned to do all my antenatal review there because less busy and easier and second i planned to deliver there and third ney does not feel good with me staying too long at my aunt house here in kk.

Yesterday was my birthday. Nothing interesting actually. ney is not here with me. malas!

Now i am 31 weeks + pregnant.

Sunday, June 14

Second holiday

I'm off to tawau for a few weeks tomorrow morning by airasia.
Dont know when i'll be going back here.
Maybe early July.
So maybe i wont be updating my blog for quite sometimes, but if i can get through the wireless network there i will update.
Crossing finger.

Today i am so so so so tired coz we bejalan from noon till almost 10 pm just now so my feet is killing me.
I've just realize just now while washing my feet..seems like my toes staring to swell.
The funny thing is now i can't bentdown to cut my toe nail anymore.
I don't want other people to help me coz emm i just don't trust them.
Don't la how.

One thing that i'm really hopping on is that tawau wont be as hot as kk.
That's all.

Wednesday, June 10

I am 6 months...

3 more months for me to go through this pregnancy.
Now i feel takut if i'm thinking about labor.
Yes, seriously takut.
The 3 months will pass by like a wind soo fast and i wont realize it will soon goin to arrive.
Maybe i will deliver a month earlier or weeks earlier than 30th Sept.
That's the scary part.
Even baby's stuff i haven't completely buy everything.
I am abit stressed about this.

Yesterday i am officially 6 months pregnant.
Went for a review at the clinic, luckily not too many patient so i finished fast.
The nurse gave me another tetanus shot on my left arm and it hurt!
Then went to the lab to get blood test. yes another needle goin inside my right arm to have my blood. dunno why this time its abit hurt.
Maybe that time i was thinking about my other half on how he worried if the lady made a mistake like last time until my arm turned into blue and i'm in pain (they salah cucuk the needle) so ney will follow me whenever i have to do blood test, but this time he wasn't there with me and i'm sad.


The funny thing was when the nurse was pressing my tummy to check the baby and my placenta she wanna measure it (24 cm). I felt very very ticklish until i have to make my hard.
Actually i was surprise on how the nurse checked my tummy because she pressed very hard and that time i'm scared that it might hurt the baby.

Another thing i am scared is about breastfeeding.
1. It's goin to be painful.
But some people already bising2 about how i feel and i'm pissed about it. is it so wrong to feel that way?? NO! i have the right. it's not that i don't want to breastfeed my baby at all!

2. Scared if my breast wont be the same again.

I've been staying at my aunt rita's house for 5 days already and i'm enjoying my stay here.
Away from my other aunt's house which always make me stress.
The only thing here that they don't have the aircon so the heat here really making me crazy! haha
This friday or saturday i will be going back there because i have to pack my stuff.
5 more days for me to fly to meet ney. Can't wait!!

Thursday, May 28

1 week holiday

I'm going back to keningau tomorrow with my uncle.
I need to go somewhere to relax more or maybe i feel that i wanna change my current environment for awhile.
It might be boring coz there's no laptop there for me to connect to internet.
It might be less food for me to eat anytime like im here.
Wahhh.... terpaksa i tahan only ni later.
Hopefully my aunt from sikuati will go back to keningau too this sunday so it will be less boring for us there.

I really feel soo heavy this time. The baby really getting big or maybe heavier.
Susah sikit for me to move around.
I am thinking about a name already for her. But just in case it was HIM then i have to spare a boy's name too right? 
Thinking or searching for baby boy's name is soo hard than i thought.
So if you guys have any idea for a nice boy's name let me know hehe.

I have a problem now.
Seriously i have no idea at all how to solve this problem.
Its really bugging me so bad, sometimes i wanna cry about it but i have to show ney that i am strong to face this problem so that he also will stay strong like me.

God i really need you this time.


Tuesday, May 26

Nothing important

Last night so so so tired!! Like i can't move or do anything anymore. All because i kinda did too much walking.

Since sunday i went to parkson with my aunt to find some baby's stuff. I did buy some and stuff now is expensive!! we were there for almost 2 and half hours (blame me) then i really want to eat oreo mcflurry so since the mcD at wawasan was out of ice we have to drive to centre point to get it. My aunt park the car outside the cp only so i have to walk into cp just to get the mcflurry! gila penat btl!! After that when we go home to my aunt house i forgot my hp upstairs of her house so again i have to walk up the stairs one more time!!!! kesian btl my feet ohhhh. sudah now i felt heavier than before, every movement abit hard for me to do it again and again.

Then yesterday we were making pudding for the gathering at my mum's house so there's alot of movement going on. i have to drive to btc for a couple of times also because we kekurangan some ingredients. *sigh* very very tiring. at night during the gathering i was sooo hungry so i just go and eat anything i want because all the food giving me sooo much temptation that i can't resist hehehe plus again the dessert!! so after i eat this and that my tummy was very very kencang!!! like i can't even move anymore. so eating too much also make me feel tired haha.

Today again went to clinic (yes i went also bah) for the weight monitoring again, with the heat which making me crazy and sweat all day and the tiredness still in me.....*sigh* susah betul this life hahaa.

weight : 41.5 kg oklah.... almost 42kg already.

pregnancy : 22 weeks

me : easily sweat and feel hot this days. my aunt said this is only the beginning. later on the third trimester will getting hotter.

my mind : scared. scared if the gender will change.

current photo : (mau juga kan *wink*)

last night during gathering. see my tired face?? huh.

Saturday, May 23

100 post!!! did you notice??

Women who is pregnant of baby boy their baby bump seems different than a women who pregnant baby girl.

If they having a baby girl their bump seems "lebih menonjol" towards the front, and if they having a baby boy their bump not soo towards the front, macam lebih mendatar abit lah.

For example of some celebrities:

 Denise Richard pregnant with either Lola or Sam

Jessica Alba pregnant with her first daughter.

Katie Holmes pregnant with her first daughter as well.

And Nicole Richie pregnant with her daughter Harlow.

Where as Christina pregnant with her first son.

Gwen Stefani pregnant with either Kingston or Zuma.

And finally Ashlee Simpson pregnant with her first son.

Did you notice the different of their belly?
i do.

How about my baby bump? 
Right now i'm only 5months plus so the bump not so big yet. but the bump abit towards the front for me. plus the doctor said that it's a 90% girl for me.

I decide not to go to the clinic every week starting from next week because i'm too lazy. Just for the weight monitoring really seriously buang masa. i wanna see if the stuff nurse st the clinic will call me about it or not.

Tuesday, May 19


Pregnancy : 21 weeks

Placenta : 19cm +

Weight : 41 kg (still consider abit overweight, suppose to gain only 0.5kg - madness)

Baby : Very active moving all around

Me : Really really loves to eat !!

Need : Start shop some of baby's item.

My mind : Very confuse on planning my holidays. all because of the review2 stuff to the clinic.          Gah!! 

Monday, May 18

Saturday, May 16

MikeyBelle's wedd photos

On the 9th of May 2009

Myra (youngest sister) is the bride's maid paired up with the bestman Joel.

The Mr & mrs Gregory with my cousins zz, sheila and elly.

Me with lala and elly.

The groom giving some speech.

The guest's favours.

Cutting cake part.

Sorry because most of the pictures seems blur and not very clear. It is because of the lighting during the event is not that bright. Most of this picture i upload from my cousin's camera, my camera is with ney.

Thursday, May 14

Halfway to go !!!

I am officially 5 Months pregnant !!
But still my tummy not that big, nevermind as long as the baby is healthy.
Cepat pula masa berlalu... now there's only 4 months left for me for my pregnancy.
So excited !!

Ney visited me the other day and for mei's wedding but only for 5 days so now he already went back.
Here he is with little Princess who is getting abit fatter than before. Much more cuter and he really loves her.

We also went to Damai Specialist to get me checked up in every detail about my pregnancy and we get to keep the baby's picture.


The doctor tried so hard to get the baby's feature but it susah coz there's so much movement that's why this picture clearly showing the skul, but if see the original picture can see the shape of its chubby cheek.
And she's facing right towards front of the scanner. 
Getting to know the sex of the baby also was a hard part actually. The doctor took long moment just to know what's the sex because the baby's position always changing until i also have to move abit to the left and to the right. funny.
The doctor said that 90% its a GIRL !!! because rata only, there's no timbul timbul *wink* hahaa

We are sooo happy !!
Hopefully the 10% will be finally definitely a girl.

We also saw her yawning inside the womb, we saw all her movement and we also saw her covering her genital part with her hand *wink* 
maybe she still don't want us to know kan.
The doctor said everything about the baby is normal, fine and healthy.
OOhh and she's very active in there.

I will post some of Mei's wedding reception photos later.

Thursday, May 7

I am not me

The homone made me a different anne.
Before this any problems or whatever people said negative stuff i am strong enough to handle the situation. 
But now...

NOT ANYMORE!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm very sensitive about that!
I cried about this.
I cannot tahan already like this everyday!!

Don't this person have any brain before she talk about you!!!
Don't this person have any feelings or reminder about herself!!!!
Don't she realized anything that she'd just said!!!!!
Damn betul ohh this person.
Never appreciate what people have done for her.

I am sooooo confused right now.
I don't know what else to do or say anymore.

The reason i am still here :
The tiny thing inside my womb which growing everyday and the movement 
are getting harder everyday.

Tuesday, May 5


Went to clinic for weight monitoring :

- Current weight according to the clinic's scales i was 39kg but according at home's scales i am 41kg. Bingung juga but i think clinic's one is the right one.

- I don't really like the clinic today. It was sooo packed with people especially new born baby. And the smell was so not good.

- Current blood preassure 100/60. Before this was 110/70. I don't know which one is the best.

I already listed down some baby's stuff for me and ney to buy. Hopefully its not too early. I think depends on ourselves decision. Hehehee..i just an't wait actually to buy it.

Why when we always nice to that person but one day he/she simply act annoying to you then another day he/she will act very nice to you. But mostly you the one will start the nice thing then only he/she will e okay to you???? I REALLY REALLY HATE THAT KIND OF PERSON.

Am i allowed to hate anything during pregnancy? is it okay?

Saturday, May 2

coming to 19weeks

What's up with me?

- I don't know why this couple of days i felt like it's hard for me to breath as normal as it is. Maybe i've heartburn like normal preggers do but its been days so weird juga kan... Don't know what should i do. Or maybe i am full with food because for the past two weeks my "goin to loo time" seems like not normal. Always skip like 3days.
Worried if i have breathing problem or if my asthma goin to visit me back soon (palis2).

- My hair and nail seems to grow alot faster than usual. It's good actually but on my belly is sooo not good. Before i get pregnant there's only fine hair growing but now tambah ketara already and i don't like it!

- Not only my foot easily feel tired and hurt, now my betis also! looks like the pregnancy pain- on-body starting to occur on me. I'm easily feel very2 tired this days too, even if i just stay and sit at home. So weird.

- I realized that i'm walking real slow already at this stage!! and i hate it so much. i can't even run abit fast. I felt that my body & my stomach was heavy. huh.....

Ney is coming next friday. so excited.

I'm still curious about my baby's gender!! I hope when we do scanning next week can know already because i can't wait to buy stuff for her/him, hee but if the baby in the best position to see lah. My instinct always says that its goin to be a girl. even ney wanted a girl. does mother instinct always right?

Thursday, April 30


I've been having bad and scary dreams this past few days.
Mostly related to my baby.
I wonder why....

Is it because i'm worried too much about it?
I don't seem too worry juga.
Maybe i always feeling cautious and feel tired everyday.
Don't know lah.

Tuesday, April 28

more pregnant

The other day my aunt came here to bring home my grandma to her house, stay there until mei's reception. So weird for me as she was busy asking and talking about my pregnancy to my other aunt then when we were having our lunch then i said that she looks thinner than before but her tummy still nampak boroi lah hehe. She just smiling and said like jokingly that she's pregnant again but me and my other aunt don't believe her! then she said "see even you all also didn't believe me how can i accept the fact that i'm pregnant again??" it was funny because at the age 41 she still pregnant again!

But then seriously she is pregnant and she could accept the fact that she is!! its sooo funny. she didn't want to tell anybody because it's embarassing for her. She said this year she suppose to be a grandma already for my baby but then she also suddenly pregnant! so for her bikin malu lah hehe. Now she's 2months prengnant and i think her due date is in early December so i will deliver my baby first.

Even Lala my cousin don't believe that her mother is pregnant, she said old already still wanna have baby but actually my aunt don't want a baby anymore so this time she and her husband "TER....." produced the baby hahaha....


Okay its kinda boring talking about pregnancy stuff only kan.

Friday, April 24

new family member

Meet Princess !!

This is Sheila with Princess :

Actually it's my mum's puppy. They already have Malchi (chihuahua + maltese) and now my mum buy another one. Don't know what's up with them buying all this pups.

Thursday, April 23


I said before that my lower abdomen sometimes in slight pain so i did some research (actually from :

It's quite typical. This aching, as opposed to cramping, is usually caused by the stretching of the muscles and ligaments supporting your womb (uterus). You'll probably feel it when you're getting up from a bed or chair, when you cough or when you get out of the bath. It may also become a problem when the baby's head engages in the later stages of pregnancy.

So i think it is normal. Pheewww...!!

Luckily at this stage where i am right now i didn't feel any of that, that often la. Only feeling like bloated most of the time.

I just came back from my mum's house coz i stayed there for afew day before Mei go to australia to register their marriage there for a couple of days. Because after this maybe i wont be able to spend any night with her anymore coz her husband will be sleeping with her.

So the other day went to clinic again for the weight monitoring session and i lost 1kg due to the bad diarrheoa i had since last friday. I have no idea what cause it and maybe it's normal for pregnant woman because of the hormone. Don't know lah. But on monday i am back to normal again and now i am 17weeks.
After that we went to the dentidt to check my gum and i need to do the scaling stuff if i'm not mistaken but i haven't done it yet. Maybe next week. My gum is getting worst!

Nowadays i can feel abit of small movement already from the baby and i love it. But my friend said that my tummy doesn't look like 4months pregnant. She said my tummy is small. So i was abit worried when she said that. Hopefully for the next few weeks my tummy will be bigger.

Ohh this is funny. The other day my grandma suddenly wanted to have a peek at my breast and i was like "huh??for what?" she said she just want to look at how's my breast look and she said what for i malu malu coz she's my grandma i was laughing and show her la. Then she said maybe you gonna have a girl.

I'm crossing my finger for what she'd say. hahaa. How can they know the sex just by looking at breast/nipple. Funny.

Friday, April 17


I had a dream last night.

I was back at my high school again and i attend all the classes like the old days. That time my tummy already like 20weeks pregnant and i didn't tell anybody. So in that dream i went to the toilet to pee ;p then in there some of the girls saw me and they start to say bad thing about my body and laugh loud about my big tummy. They said that i have "perut buncit" and i was so so so mad at them! because i can't tell them that i'm actually pregnant and i don't want too. So i just have to keep it to myself and i couldn't say anything back to them.


Why i have such dream? i don't even worried anything about my body actually. i don't mind getting abit fat. That's why i think its weird for me to have that dream.

What i'm thinking:

My lower abdomen started to feel abit of contraction for the past few days and ofcourse i'm worried like hell. i'm scared about the baby or my placenta. this is soo hard for me.
Some says that it is because i'm worried too much or having stress that's why it happened. I do really hope that that's the reason i felt the pain. I am quite stress out right now.

Nowadays i tend to forget things easily. Sikit sikit lupa this and that. I hate when that happen.

Every night i will touch or hold my tummy just so i can feel if suddenly a movement happen. I was hoping it will happen because the internet at said that at this period i may feel some movement but sometime tidak perasan. Can't wait for next weeks to come coz i will feel movement already.

Last night i had pizza set for dinner. In my mind this is crazy, since i have to jaga my weight because next week i have to recheck again my weight at the clinic. So if i gain more weight i don't know lah how.

Thursday, April 16


On the 14th April i am officially 4months pregnant. I went for check up at the clinic that day.

I am excited because of my growing baby and my tummy getting bigger every week. I suppose the length of the baby is about between 8 - 10cm.

Right now i'm just worried about my gum bleeding. See lah if next month still the same even if i use the medicine they've given i'll go to the dentist.

The nurse said that i was overweight, over 2kg. and i was like what?? isn't that was suppose to be good for me to gain weight? plus it's only 2kg. So maybe it's not good for my pregnancy at this level. My weight suppose to be 37kg only.

I've just found out that Dynas the actress (sure you all know her) had a premature labour contractions during 61/2 months pregnant!! i am so shocked and feel so so so sorry for her lost on her baby girl. So because of that i am worried about myself!! very very worried!

Monday, April 13

i felt it

After 3 days of shopping none stop (which is kinda crazy for my situation during my pregnancy at this level) i experienced the most painful feeling on my feet!! i counldn't sleep well the first day we went shopping from wisma to 1B. The second day we went to city mall (finally i found a dress and i really really love it!) and this time my hips was in pain. Then the third day we went to centre point pula, i felt all of my body in pain, in my head i can't do this anymore, i have to stop going out after this for awhile but i still need to find some stuff *sigh* so because of this reach home i straightly fall on my comfty bed and my legs were about to torn apart i felt *laugh*. i asked my cousin to help me massage my legs.

I wish ney was here to help me. maybe next month only we get to see each other. Tomorrow is my review to the clinic. I just hope nothing bad that they will find out about the baby.

Thursday, April 9

On the 8th

- had lunch at Sutra with my mum. i ate a plate of rice, a plate full of salad and two plate of dessert still not feeling full enough. gila nie. then we got free cake from Sutra and my mum gave it to me as congratulation for having my first baby (which is still in the womb) funny nya!! chocolate cake again that.

- went to saloon to cut my hair. so now my hair is shorter than ever. the lady make it so pretty because she blow dryed it, so i'm thinking i have to rajin rajin blow my hair always myself just to make it look nice. malas nya.......... yes i'm a very lazy person.

what else to talk about?
no idea already...

Monday, April 6


Finally i get a chance to blog again. I've been away for awhile because of some reason that i can't even avoid or do anything.
I'm talking about morning sickness. Surprise surprise!! Yes i am expecting *blush* and now i am just in the end of my first trimester so the morning sickness is not sooo bad compare for the past few months back. because of the morning sickness which usually different to every woman, mine there's some weird stuff including seeing laptop or computer. When i was still in the beginning of my first trimester i couldn't even look at ANY laptop or computer, if i do, my stomach will feel weird and wanna throw up and i'll start to get dizzy. Funny kan, but now ok ok already but still i can't sit infront of the screen for hours lah.

I can't believe i'm telling about this pregnancy on my blog. Malu pula. Anyway, i shouldn't feel embarasse actually because it's the most exciting thing ever happen. whatever people wanna say, i don't even mind.

Yes i've change my layout again due to my hatered on the color of my previous layout and it's all because of this pregnancy. i even hate the color of RED! hate it soo much. weird kan. i hate bright colors too.

To other bloggers that been visiting my blog sorry if i did not reply you guy's message also all the tag. i will update more if i'm in good condition and i'll visit your blog too!

Monday, February 9

tag debt

I think i have another two tag other than this... don't worry i'll do it soon.

Okay this tag was from Ratna. thanx!!

It's an award actually and i have to list down 10 about myself. and i'm sure you guys wanna throw up already reading about me and plus i have no idea what to tell so i'm just going to say whatever lah k. i found very funny about all this award stuff that circle around this blog world. but what the heck ;P

1. i love shoes soo much.

2. i love marshmellow.

3. i am phobia on height and bird.

4. i love cocktail and vodka.

5. i hate milo.

6. i am quite short actually. LOL.

7. i love kids.

8. i'm very secretive person.

9. i am easily get hungry but hard to be fat.

10. and i'm on a new journey in my life right now.

I don't know if i'm ready for that. it is hard. oh about the layout seriously i don't have any strength to do it at this moment.

p/s To astro STOP all this advert about all this Tayangan Hebat !!
p/p/s I hate ghost stories. i swear i will never watch any of it again!!!

Wednesday, February 4

help me pls !

This is the two skins that i've found but couldn't decide which one to use. so maybe you guys can help me. if not, nevermind.

there's very small loves of the background on this skin.
simple actually.

how about this?
yeah...there's love too.

Or both of the skins is blahh?? i don't want a skin that look childish.

I'm off. i want to get some rest. i am stressing out this past few days. makes my skin on my face not healthy. i hate acne!!!

Tuesday, February 3

what is wrong with me

I already found some skins that i love.

I am going to change my blog's layout.

But i don't know when.

Right now i felt so weak and i have no idea what's wrong with myself.

Even to surf the internet also i have no strength to do it. but today i manage because i felt bored, so i force myself.

Ok i end my post here. nothing important though. the sunlight is killing me.

Something funny happened at Giant last night.

Saturday, January 31

the infamous gambling

I am talking about wahui. it is very famous in keningau.everybody is playing it no matter how young or old you are.

How does this wahui works?

Well first there's a question which normally in rhyme they put and you have to guess what the answer is base on the answer paper full of picture. Mostly animals. This is the picture of it :

Old version

Colored version

So that's the answer paper. after you read the question then you have to think hard what's it gonna be the answer. its not that very hard. i did win a few times. but most of the time i loose some money lah. Just choose some number that you think will be the answer then bet on each number. depends on you how many you wanna bet lah. there is people in keningau bet till rm100+. so its up to you.

Now both of us in tawau so we didn't get to play it anymore. boring.

Ohh i wanna show my hamster current condition in keningau. he's getting fatter. ney's family fed him oat everyday.

He's so so so cute. he like to be fed by hand. awww...

Friday, January 30


Today i don't really have any mood. and ney keep on disturb me. so annoying. just now i am so mad because i'm so hungry and ney, he's a very lazy ass!!

Plus this afternoon i tested on him if he remember any of the important date for us to celebrate in both of our lives. Guess what? he TOTALLY forgot about it! wtf??!

not any single date! so ask me how am i suppose to act? i am soo pissed!!

Ohh i don't even want to remember about this. but i am blogging about it here for me to remind or ask him once again in the future. i'll kill him if he forget again.

So since i have no mood to do anything i am off to watch tv this whole night. gonna watch Pirates of the carribbien (did i spell it right?correct me) later on tv3.

Nowadays :
- i love the word excruciating. i don't know why. maybe i love to listen if people say it.
- i'm thinking about changing my layout again.
- my smelling sense can't stop catching the olive oil scent. i don't know why. its like the scent is all around me. weird.

Okay that's all for now.

Toodles !!

Thursday, January 29

should i hate tawau


Because of it i'm far away from my family and friends.
Because of it i have no friends here or anyone i know except for ney.
Because of it i am alone at home everytime ney gone to work, especially at night.
Because of it i'm low in spirit when i'm about to wake up.
Because of it i always wake up late!!!
Because of it my appetite to eat is not stable.
Because of it we always waste our money traveling back and forth.
Because of it make both of us stressed out to get transfer fast!
Because of it i don't have the freedom to walk around.
Because of it i always feel lazy.
Because of it we seldom get to save some money.

And the last reason above is the main reason for me to hate tawau. i'm sorry if some of your hometown is in tawau. i hate it because i have to be here. okay, yeah money always the main reason and in the end most of the money gone. this is not good at all. so not good.

So now two of ney's friend already get tranfered to kk/kgau last month and this month. so i was wondering when is ney's turn??? where will he be transfer? i do really seriously hope to kgau. everyday i pray *wahh* hehe yes i do pray so that He will help us for whatever going on in our lives. i have this feeling that ney will be transfer this middle of Fedruary. Hope so.

*finger cross*

Anyway how's ur CNY? Must be enjoyable to death. mine? i mentioned already, boring. no ang pow again that. huh.

Well this is the first time i'm experiencing cny here in tawau. how was it? despite that i didn't go to any open-house here but the fireworks all are totally awesome!! yes! there's no different than kgau actually if we talk about fireworks.
Lucky for me living on the 4th floor and i have balcony facing most of the chinese's house and the town, so every fireworks i can watch clearly and beautifully.

I am bloody homesick to death. Bloody boring. and bloody tired of waiting!!

I'm sorry if all i do is complaining (-_-')

Wednesday, January 28


What about it?

Well my eyes feel like swollen but not the bad one. i felt that my eyes is too tired because maybe i'm sitting of my lappie too long. or the tv, i'm not sure. i felt my eyes is abit painful and distract whenever there's a sunlight. well overall i'm not sure what's wrong.

Maybe my eyes begin to be sensitive to bright light or whatever.

I just solved my laptop problem a few mins ago. my desktop's program / the entire of my lappie's program suddenly didn't show up on my desktop as usual. except for the task manager. LUCKILY!! fuhh.
So because of that i have to face this laptop's bright screen for almost 4 hours!! while sms with my uncle to help me with this stupid problem.

Yupp that's the view of my laptop just now. Totally blank.

Now my poor eyes feel very tired. i'm sleepy from the afternoon again this but i tahan only because i'm scared at night i wont be able to sleep because ney is not here with me to accompany me. huh.

OMG. i totally forgot to wish ney a very very HAPPY belated BIRTHDAY ----> 23rd Jan !! and u're getting old already haha!!